These 27 Homer Simpson Quotes Are Just Some of the Reasons Why Everyone Loves Him!

It’s amazing to think that a series of small cartoon shorts on the Tracey Allman show in 1987 would transform into a cartoon behemoth only years later. The Simpsons’ first episode was a Christmas-themed special on December 17, 1989, and it was an instant hit. Fast forward 30 years and 662 episodes later and it’s still having an incredible run and remains one of Fox’s most popular shows.

The reason for its success is the attention to detail and every single comedy line is refined until it is perfect. Even Simpsons signs featured in nearly every episode of The Simpsons are clever and hilarious. One of the funniest cartoon dads is Homer Simpson and his lines on the show are all memorable. Here are 27 of the funniest Homer Simpson quotes ever!

1) Let the Homer Simpson quotes begin!

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "All right brain. You don't like me and I don't like you, but let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer."

“All right brain. You don’t like me and I don’t like you, but let’s just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer.”

2)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "I believe that children are the future unless we stop them now."

“I believe that children are the future unless we stop them now.”

3)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Carmen Electra: Uh, Homer, my face is up here. Homer: I've made my choice."

“Carmen Electra: Uh, Homer, my face is up here. Homer: I’ve made my choice.”

4) Homer Simpson quotes are good for your brain.

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain."

“Every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain.”

5)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "I have misplaced my pants."

“I have misplaced my pants.”

6)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Hello, operator? Give me the number for 911."

“Hello, operator? Give me the number for 911.”

7)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "I thought I had an appetite for destruction, but all I wanted was a club sandwich."

“I thought I had an appetite for destruction, but all I wanted was a club sandwich.”

8)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "If God needs money, why doesn't he just write another bible? The first one sold pretty well."

“If God needs money, why doesn’t he just write another bible? The first one sold pretty well.”

9)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "I'm in no condition to drive. Wait...I shouldn't listen to myself. I'm drunk!"

“I’m in no condition to drive. Wait…I shouldn’t listen to myself. I’m drunk!”

10)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen."

“Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.”

11) Life lessons you’ll only get from Homer Simpson quotes.

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "I've learned that life is one crushing defeat after another...until you just wish Flanders was dead."

“I’ve learned that life is one crushing defeat after another…until you just wish Flanders was dead.”

12) No, Homer Simpson quotes are the best!

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Kids are the best, Apu. You can teach them to hate the things you hate. And they practically raise themselves. What with the internet and all."

“Kids are the best, Apu. You can teach them to hate the things you hate. And they practically raise themselves. What with the internet and all.”

13)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "I'm like that guy who single-handedly built the rocket and flew to the moon. What was his name? Apollo Creed?"

“I’m like that guy who single-handedly built the rocket and flew to the moon. What was his name? Apollo Creed?”

14)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Lisa, if you don't like your job, you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way!"

“Lisa, if you don’t like your job, you don’t strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That’s the American way!”

15)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Marge, you know it's rude to talk when my mouth is full."

“Marge, you know it’s rude to talk when my mouth is full.”

16)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail."

“Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail.”

17)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "I'm not normally a praying man. But if you're up there, please save me, Superman."

“I’m not normally a praying man. But if you’re up there, please save me, Superman.”

18) …or Homer Simpson quotes.

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Nothing is ever boobs or ice cream."

“Nothing is ever boobs or ice cream.”

19)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Now I have four children. You will be called 'stitchface'."

“Now I have four children. You will be called ‘stitchface’.”

20) How about 27 Homer Simpson quotes and 27 money?

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Oh, I have three kids and no money. Why can't I have no kids and three money?"

“Oh, I have three kids and no money. Why can’t I have no kids and three money?”

21)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Roads are a suggestion, Marge, just like pants."

“Roads are a suggestion, Marge, just like pants.”

22) Good advice you only get from Homer Simpson quotes.

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "If something's hard to do, then it's not worth doing."

“If something’s hard to do, then it’s not worth doing.”

23)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Son, a woman is a lot like a refrigerator. They're about 6 feet tall, 300 pounds, and they make ice."

“Son, a woman is a lot like a refrigerator. They’re about 6 feet tall, 300 pounds, and they make ice.”

24) Oh no! We’ve almost reached the end of Homer Simpson quotes…

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Space Aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids! Eat them!"

“Space Aliens! Don’t eat me! I have a wife and kids! Eat them!”

25)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "I think Smithers picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone always says they have to work a lot harder when I'm around."

“I think Smithers picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone always says they have to work a lot harder when I’m around.”

26)

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "Marge, this ticket doesn't just me a seat. It also gives me the right - no, the duty - to make a complete ass of myself."

“Marge, this ticket doesn’t just me a seat. It also gives me the right – no, the duty – to make a complete ass of myself.”

27) I hope you enjoyed these funny Homer Simpson quotes!

27 Homer Simpson Quotes - "To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems."

“To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.”

Homer Simpson cheering and yelling 'whoo-hoo".

H/t: The Chive

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