Choosing a dog takes care and knowledge to ensure you get the best pet for your family and the best family for your pet. In other words, both parties have to be happy with each other.
Dog breeds each have their own traits and personalities and it’s important they align with your own family. St. Louis-based artist Grace Gogarty has created an illustrated guide to dog breeds and the descriptions are simply hilarious. According to Bored Panda, Gogarty has worked at a doggy daycare and has experienced caring for each of these breeds first hand.
St. Louis-based artist Grace Gogarty has created an illustrated guide to dog breeds and it’s hilarious!
Large Dog Breeds
- “You wanna go right now?! Let’s go, I’ll f*** you up, bro!!”
- Scared of leaves.
- Made to be trekking thru 3 feet of snow.
- Living with you in Kentucky now.
- “Exercise me 6 hours every day or I’ll eat this couch!!”
- Distinguished vocalist.
- Tsundere (A Japanese term that describes a person who is initially cold (and sometimes even hostile) before gradually showing a warmer, friendlier side over time.)
- Sheds its bodyweight in fur every day.
- It would 100% die for you.
4) Bernese Mountain Dog
- Social anxiety stems from not being able to be picked up anymore.
- Had another dream you yelled at them and just wants to make it up to you.
5) German Shepherd
- “Did someone say BARK for 4 hours again?!”
- Only loves 1 person.
- Still won’t listen to them.
6) Great Dane
- Weird horse.
- “It’s naptime again.”
- Trying really hard not to whip things off the countertop with their tail.
- Not actually trying that hard…
- Movies and TV have lied to you.
- Scared of even themselves.
- Drooled out most of their brain cells.
- Hasn’t quite figured out the phrase “don’t jump up!”.
- “Thinkin’ bout you.”
9) Golden Retriever
- Every second not being a pet is gonna be a problem.
- Level 5 clinger.
- Would like every genre except rap and country.
Medium Dog Breeds
- Gentle angel baby OR neurotic mess.
- No in-between.
11) Border Collies
- Made to be toiling in the fields.
- But stuck here now.
- Pure anxiety.
- Will run until they bleed.
- Yellow labs: traded brain cells for friendliness and a food machine.
- Chocolate labs: Pure insanity and exudes demonic energy.
- Black labs: Loyal and holding it together for everyone. Black labs also make great babysitters!
- Social skills with fellow dogs severely lacking.
- Either sleeping or freaking out.
14) Poodles and Doodles
- Smart enough to know what you’re saying.
- Disregards it anyway.
Small Dog Breeds
15) Shih Tzu
- “Please, hold me…”
- Stinky, yet eternal.
- “Please ma’am, they don’t feed me at home…”
- Definitely gets fed at home.
- Functioning mess.
- “I’m ANGRY and I don’t know why.”
- OK, I forgive you.
- Untold secrets hidden in folds.
- “I hope they breed me longer so I can reach the countertop…”
19) Yorkshire Terrier
- “Pick me up!”
- “No, put me down.”
- Wants to love but doesn’t know how sometimes.
- *Strangers DON’T INTERACT*
- Could be the exact opposite.
21) Bichon Frise
- Enchanted cloud.
- Enchanted mop.
23) Shiba Inu
- “Don’t FUC**** touch me, bro!!”
H/t: Bored Panda
I had a couple of breeds on this list and I’d say the description is pretty accurate! Please share this hilarious guide to dog breeds by artist Grace Gogarty with your friends and family.